April 28, 2011

Because Every Girl Wants Hairdo Options

R decided that Ginger needed a new hairdo. Thus the Hallowig pattern was adapted to fit her. I do wish that girl would use her powers for good..... Maybe Ginger will be more receptive to her new 'do' after the needles are removed. Frankly, I think it's a stunning look for her.

She's not always the lady you saw in the first picture. Sure, most of the time, but other times you just have to relax.

Sometimes you just have to cover your eyes and say, "I want to be alone."
Other times you just need to find your spot in the sun and soak it up.

April 16, 2011

I am OLD.....

This week was our annual visit to our eye doctor. We just love him. And he likes us too, which makes us like him that much more! He saves jokes for us all year and then we all cram in the little exam room to hear them. How on earth he can figure out what our prescriptions should be is beyond me with all that laughing going on! His staff is more like family than an office staff. They have a very dry wit, similar to ours, so we just zing each other the whole time we are there.

I think it was a couple of years ago when he decided that I needed to try mono-vision. Yes, I need bifocals. I told you I was old. Geez, weren't you listening? You young whipper snapper you! I hated it! I couldn't focus the way I wanted to. I complained to my Dad who had been doing it for years. He told me that his eye doctor told him, "If you have a brain, you can do it." Well, apparently I'm old and don't have a brain. I put up with it as long as I could stand it. Finally this year I told him no more! Wouldn't you know it, they have bifocal contact lenses now. I was sent home with a pair of those. They were okay, but he didn't have the strength I needed for my right eye. Next time I went in with RL and the kids, he had the right lens. So, I went home with another pair. At first I loved them. Then I realized I was seeing far away much, much better, but I couldn't read worth squat. So....he gave me another pair - for just seeing far away and told me to get reading glasses. Now I am trying to decide which pair I want to stick with. Regardless of what I decide, I will need reading glasses. L needed to go to Michael's, so I had him help me pick out some reading glasses while we were there. Have you seen cheap reading glasses? Seriously people! Isn't it bad enough that I am old and blind, but now I have to wear something that looks like crayons melted all over the frames. The color combinations are horrible! L offered to paint some for me. Might take him up on it! And, don't forget the rhinestones! You can put rhinestones on poop and you're still going to have poop! So now I have two new pairs of reading glasses - one for my purse and one for my knitting/reading area. What's next? Between new bras and new eyes, I'm becoming a new woman!

I'll try not to be so cantankerous next time I post. Maybe I just need a nap, I'm getting old you know.

April 3, 2011

Over the Shoulder Boulder Holder

Sometimes being a woman just sucks, doesn't it?

I am going to approach a delicate subject here - bras. For me, buying a new bra is like buying tires. You don't want to, but you know you need to. Maybe you drive around without as much tread as you should. Then one day, you have a blow out and you are faced with the inevitable. You HAVE to buy new tires. Well, that's what happened to me, but within the delicate world of bras. The last time I bought a bra, I was living in Florida. That was almost fourteen years ago. During that fourteen year period, I have gained a lot of weight. Unfortunately, bras don't grow with you. They will stretch with you until they can't stretch anymore, but they don't grow. I had the worst looking bras you ever saw and just prayed nobody besides me would ever see them. Then one day recently, I had a pain on the left side of my chest. I had been experiencing muscle pain for some time in my upper chest, but thought it was stress. I made an appointment with my doctor. Verdict? Mammogram to be on the safe side - new bra because it is necessary. Really? I can't wear this one for another fifteen years? I recruited Mom and headed to the store. They had some professional bra fitters there. Oh great! They're going to see my bra and report me to the National Bra Council for neglect! (Is there a National Bra Council?) Bless that wonderful woman! She measured me with my shirt on. Holy Moly! I wear that size now? What was that again? Surely I heard you wrong. Believe me, I am not bragging! I was flat chested for many years - before children - and I had accepted it. I come from a long line of flat chested women on my Mom's side. I was truly cool with it.

Let's flash back about 30 years ago. When I was a kid, we would visit my grandmother, on Daddy's side, on her farm in Tennessee. She had this 'contraption' that would hang on her wardrobe. We had NO idea what it was, but it looked like it took about two or three people to lace it up and tighten it onto you. Why would anybody have to wear something like that - said a very flat chested teenager.

Now we are back to the dressing room yesterday. I had walked past all these really cute bras. Underwires, floral prints, animal prints, black, white, red, lacy, you name it, they had it. The woman measures me and then says she'll be right back. Does she bring me an adorable little leopard skin bra with lace? No. She brought me freakin' body armor! Really? How on earth do you get all those hooks hooked up behind your back without any assistance. Then it hit me - I have become my grandmother! The lady finally came back with a bra that fastened in the front. Thank goodness. I could finally see what I was doing. Instantly my shoulders went back. My posture was 100% improved. She commented on the fact that 'they' were finally where they belonged and not down where they were. Gee, thanks.

We endure so many things - our 'monthly', childbirth, menopause and the joys of bras. Or as my sister eloquently put it - Over the Shoulder Boulder Holders. Ain't it great to be a woman?